Friday, May 16, 2008

Murderer by momstheword

I am a murderer. If you do something to harm my child, I will seek you out, hunt you down and kill you.

Okay, I'm not really a murderer, but I could be.

Without hesitation or regret I could and would kill any human being that purposefully, physically harmed one of my children. I'm not talking a "push in the school yard" kinda thing; I'm talking the kind of horrible things only a Mother and Father can dream up in the deep, dark recesses of their minds once they bring these incredible beings into the world.

I know, I know--it's been said before....we have all felt it....but for me, it was an earth-shattering realization.

I was not a "baby person." My sister did all the babysitting and baby-holding when we were growing up; I just wanted to play with dogs and horses. On the rare occasion that I did babysit, it was only because I needed the money to pay for more horse riding lessons.

Age and marriage did little to change my level of enthusiasm for children. After all, I was a university grad, a DINK, and a Business Woman, traveling to exotic locales like Toronto and Montreal....most importantly, I finally had my very own horse and my very own dog. How could life be any sweeter?

And then we brought her home.

That evening, the agony of what we had allowed into our home, and more importantly, into our hearts was too much to bear.

"What were we thinking?" I sobbed. "What the Hell do we do when she comes home crying because her friends have made fun of her? WHAT WERE WE THINKING?!"

I am a murderer.

Written and submitted by momstheword


The Motherhood Byters said...

I hear you sister. I am still surprised at the surge of intense adrenalin through my veins when I am in a situation where I need to protect my child. I have actually had to talk my self out of going to the school yard and pinning some little obnoxious bully to the wall and giving him the scare of his life. And that goes for adults as well. The rage that surged through me when an after school worker chastised my daughter with undue harshness that scarred her was powerful and freaking terrifying. I could have ripped that woman's limbs off.

The Motherhood Byters said...

Oh, and keep writing momstheword. I want to hear more!